The Job that I Loved So Much

Hello, may I take your order?

haha, seriously I worked 1.5 years in a prominent fast-food chain and it was the BEST experience I’ve ever had. Mostly because no-one at that job gave a rats ass – eventually our store was bought by another fast food franchise because we weren’t making any money. Busy as hell though, right in the city next to a train station.

I specifically went for closing shifts weeknights and opening shifts weekends. There’s no soul to the afternoon shifts, there you just come in, slap together a few burgers while singing offkey with the store radio, pick their noses then saunter off again. Where’s the heart? Open shifts are great coz it’s usually just you and some other lackey and a not-so-serious manager (the serious managers get put for close and busy shifts). All morning we would make wisecracks and race each other cutting tomatoes and laugh at the weirdos and old people who come in at 8am. Freakin hilarious. After a while you got to know some of the regulars and you’d actually make their weirdo orders before they got to the counter (one fatass would always get a burger with no sauce and an ice-cream. He would eat this then spend 40 min in the toilet. Every. Sat. Morning).

Night shifts were busy as hell, but as a guy, I have the luxury of working back, away from the abuse of customers. We mess up an order, the front girls take the heat. Then the girls would come and yell at us and we’d all tell them they were pretty till they forgave us. Theres something just hot about a angry young woman in a fast-food outfit (I need therapy I know). Night shifts actually built quite a bit of camaraderie- everyone takes a bite of the shit sandwich or else everyone goes home late.

The managers are what probably made my fast-food experience so enjoyable and unique. They were are young, didn’t really care, and were funny as hell. We were able to make any burgers we wanted (as long as we made the managers some as well). We stole chicken nuggets and delicious ice-cream deserts. They turned up the radio full blast after every shift and we all just mop-danced to that. God I miss those nights hahaha. Actually I really admire one of those managers in particular, he was just so damn cool. I mean it had to be the hardest job in the world managing a bunch of 20year olds in a obviously dead-end job for the lowest pay. The way he handled the non-workers was just cool. Never got mad. Never yelled. Just said “ok, you can go home.” This would usually be followed by the slacker saying “but…but…but..but” and he would just shake his head and smile and hold his hand up and say “please, I don’t want to hear it. Just go home.” What could anyone do? Why don’t they teach this stuff to people at school?

Plus there are a few interesting stories: One night the drinks machine CAUGHT ON FIRE. How that happened I still don’t know. We all clustered around the smoking machine and stared up through the ice chute, and you could see little fire going on inside. Closed the place early that night. One time my best friend at the place put a cockroach in someones BLT, and it never came back so the guy musta eaten it. Ewwwww. Speaking of insects, an exterminator came once started spraying the place WHILE we were still making burgers. That can’t be right. Oh, and we had an episode where the lettuce had all these little catipillars in it. We just picked them out and away we went. Another time I punched some guy in the head because he had been acting like a fag for months, and not only did the store manager let me keep my job, he thanked me for it. All the guys used to watch between the metal shelves that we slide the burgers down to the counter and yell out code words if a particularly hot chick was ordering. Then we would all cluster around like ferrets and oggle. She’d get riduculously large helpings of everything in her food to go with her nice buns. ahhahaha omg I miss that damn job. I could go on and on. If they had had a decent pension plan I’d still be there.