Help! I want to Get out of Nursing

I am another one of those nurses who hates her job. I have been a nurse for 18 long years so I have given it a good try. I am finally able to admit that yes indeed I do hate it.

For a long time I alternated between hating it then feeling guilty about it and hoping the next day would be better. I went into it for stable career and the money, sorry to those people who wanted to help people and think I am shallow. I was not surprised what is was and is like out there. There are many things I hate about my job but it is what it is and I do not expect nursing to change, I just want to escape out of it.

How therapeutic it is to read others comments, and the relief to know I am not the only one. To those who judge other nurses comments I say stop for a moment: I can just guarantee that if you ever saw any of those nurses on their job, you would have no idea they felt the way they do. That is because no matter how much they hate what they do, they still look after the patients to the best of their ability, WHY?? because they are still professionals, how do I know this?? Because I am one of them. I hate nursing too but I also still look after the patients as best as I can.

Maybe I am burnt out, all I know is I hate going into work, I sit in the parking lot in my car trying to get up the gumption to go in. I spend all day trying not to miss stuff that probably 4 people in the chain of information missed but I will get blamed for, keeping my head down and hoping my shift ends quickly. At times I feel so hopeless the despair almost overwhelms me. Snapping at all of us to just get out isn’t always feasible. That is the trap of nursing, the money. We do not have a huge house just small, no car loans or credit cards owing but my husband could not cover bills on what he makes. We have no money to cover school loans.

How do I get out? I am pidgeon-holed by my career choice. I endlessly search the internet for something, anything to help me get out. I would pack boxes at UPS if it meant I wouldn’t have to go back to the hospital, but the bills have to be paid. If anyone has some help I would love to hear it.